Selflessness Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"Don't worry about me, what do you want?"

"Well, I'm sad for Gloria...she's gonna be bummed out when I'm twice as successful as she is."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

"Go ahead. Fly through it. I dare you."

'I know you'll find this hard to believe but I am actually a self made man.'

Bob began seeing his mother, who gave him up for adoption, professionally, three times a week. It didn't help much.

"I feel like there's a chick in me trying to escape."

"You're afraid of what?"

Highway of Life. Bump. Bump. Bump. Bump. Bump.

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending" yourself on Facebook."

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

Self Help: Get To Know Yourself/Get To Unknow Yourself

'The therapy did help your husband find his inner child, unfortunately his inner child is called Dwayne.'

'I'm prescribing a patch to help you get over your inhibitions. Put it over your eye and pretend you're a pirate!'

'All his life, Mel has been convinced that he's a poster boy for something... he's just never been able to figure out what, exactly.'

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Knight

"I'm desperate to have an inner child of my own."

"Last week, when I was telling you about my Lou Ferrigno dream, were you fighting off a yawn? Do you go to therapy? What would you do if I touched your ear? Yes or no—am I insane?"

"I get the feeling you're still keeping a lot of yourself inside."

"On a personal note, my wife, Ann, and I have agreed to separate, as I've fallen in love with the sound of my own voice."

Honey badger do care.

"Mommy you're perfect!"

Self-realization.

'Tell me your name and I'll tell you who you are!'

Blood Donor

"Once I figured out who and what I was, doors just opened for me."

Good golly! I'm some kind of bird!

Narcissus

'That one's for being a very brave boy!'

I heart my bum.

Artists without borders.

"No, a fear of snakes is not unusual, but in your case..."

"I'd say we all have our burrows, Katie. Sure, mine might literally be a hole in the ground... yours might be that inner Katie that nobody really knows."

'Egomania, you say? How on earth did you diagnose me so quickly?'