Self-talk Enthusiast Pillows

'Honey, about these motivational notes you've been leaving for yourself...'

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

Tragedy, Comedy & Selfie.

'I know you'll find this hard to believe but I am actually a self made man.'

"I have a personal blog, therefore I am!"

How to Do Small Talk??!!

"My wife and I handle our own finances. I'm an accountant and she's a grief counselor."

Time for speeches

The Girl With The Draggin' tattoo: 'Hot...Cold.'

"I don't care what you think: it's cool, it's sexy, and I feel totally empowered."

"Sorry, I don't have an opinion - just in case I get vilified on social media. . ."

"If I'm coming across as shallow, uncaring and egocentric, talk to my image manager."

'The baby took some cellphone pictures of you napping!'

'Sure I talk to myself. It's the only way I can have an intelligent conversation round here.'

"But I haven't finished explaining about dollar-cost-averaging." "Sorry, I didn't register for this course."

Develop Your Social Skills: Asking Questions is a Great Way to Keep a Conversation Going.

Seminar: Find Someone Cool to Imitate.

"Please try not to offer expert analysis."

"These are my true colors and I don't care who know it!"

"There's nothing much happening tonight... so I'm going to just talk about myself!"

'Too expensive, too long, sounds boring, the jacket is lousy...'

"I moved out here for peace and quiet, but now I keep talking to myself."

"I put my pants on the same as every other middle-aged person—in constant fear that the button will pop off under pressure."

"I grew up in St Louis and went to school in New Jersey and have been in Brooklyn ever-since, but sure, I guess technically I'm 'from' the Black Lagoon."

Hi. How's it goin'? Good, you? 'Sup. Hey. Hello. The Primordial Schmooze.

"It's my self-portrait. Obviously."

"He's surprisingly good at small talk."

Ralf liked to practice random acts of exhibitionism.

Aw, man, that's what I was going to say.

'He wants to look slightly mysterious and menacing.'

This could be your blurb.

The Social Media Expert

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

'Decisions, decisions. I don't know if I should go to university or have a tattoo and my nipples pierced.'