Self-reflective Souls Gifts

The rocky road to recovery from an infatuation with a perfect stranger.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"It's days like this that make me long for days like this."

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda

"He's his own worst enemy."

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

That party went well.

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"The overthinker"

Cellphone Islands

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

'I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.'

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

"Colin kept the bar fairly low."

"Is this who I am?"

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

"I used to think" if I don't go to work the world will fall apart. . . but it fell apart anyway."

"When you look at me, Alice, what do you see?"

'He said he wasn't good enough for me, so I married him because he's the first man to realize that.'

"You need to stop bottling it up."

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

Pachyderm insomnia.

The older I get, the more introspective I get, or is that retrospective?'

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

"After the judicial system, I'm my own harshest critic."

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'