Self-reflection Champion T-Shirts

'What matters is what you think. What others think is none of your beeswax.'

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

"It's days like this that make me long for days like this."

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

"He's his own worst enemy."

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

That party went well.

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

Cellphone Islands

* For latent content, see your psychiatrist.

"The overthinker"

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

"Colin kept the bar fairly low."

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

"When you look at me, Alice, what do you see?"

"You need to stop bottling it up."

"I used to think" if I don't go to work the world will fall apart. . . but it fell apart anyway."

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

"Is this who I am?"

Pachyderm insomnia.

"I think I'll keep a diary..."

"After the judicial system, I'm my own harshest critic."

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

"Mirror, mirror on the wall ... what the heck is up with my hair?"

"Every time I explore the corners of my mind, I have the urge to dust."

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'