Self-monitoring Pro T-Shirts

They're security cameras. I got them because I'm my own worst enemy.

Where your mind & battle are los

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

"Watch carefully...it hurts when I do this."

"Did you read my review on Amazon? Four out of four people found it helpful."

'There's no such thing as 'ookawooka-itis' -- You have got to stop watching doctor shows!'

"Every time I explore the corners of my mind, I have the urge to dust."

'Call 911! He watched 12 straight hours of football without training adequately.'

"People just don't realise how stressful this job is. . . I used to have hair!"

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

Man to date about many self-portraits on his wall: 'Self-realization is where I'm headed.'

"Hendrickje, I feel another self-portrait coming on. Bring in the funny hats."

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

'It's restless leg syndrome, I just know it.'

"The doctors say you're not doing enough to diagnose yourself."

"Adolescencia"

"I work well independently. I usually correct all the problems I create."

Man looking down long telescope at himself.

'I just feel so used all the time.'

"I feel like I'm moving from my quiet desperation phase into something a bit more colorful."

'Is there something you're not telling me, Doctor?'

After a lifetime of searching, Leonard finds himself.

"Papi! Papi! I figured it out! I know exactly what I'm gonna be when I grow up!"

Boss has a frame hanging above his desk for his face.

Psychiatry. Why go on a voyage of self-discovery when I can just Google myself?

"Feeling like a skinny person living in a fat person's body is actually quite normal."

"Don't sweat the small stuff."

"You're too self-critical."

'Four out of five websites disagree with your diagnosis.'

"I'm going to take your blood pressure, so try to relax and not think about what a high reading might mean for your chances of living a long, healthy life."

"Well sorry doc, but that's not the reading I get from my digital wrist heart monitor."

"Morning Gorgeous!"