Self-conscious Sprinter Pillows

Professor Axxis feels naked jogging without his toupee.

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

'I. Am. So. Embarrassed! How long have I been sitting across from him with that stuck in my teeth?'

“I’m not out of shape — I’m just not used to running so much.”

Pit Stop for Track and Field

'You can't join the Federal Witness Protection program just to keep your friends from seeing your bald spot.'

'No peeking!!' - Learn to Run Classes.

Office ready to leave at 5 o'clock.

'Nobody will see it in the sauna. Besides, how bad can your birthmark actually be?'

'No thanks: I'm more of a sprinter than a jogger...'

"This is first-quarter projected-earnings report--does it make my butt look big?"

Racing to Hell

'I'm so embarrassed driving such a filthy vehicle...'

He was fast, but weak, and once again it would cost him the victory.

'Stressed' Spelled Backwards is 'desserts'

Runner thinking about sleeping.

Ophidiophobic Society 10k Run.

'It's odd, that while I no longer fear death, I continue to fear pants that make my butt look too round.'

If golfers were honest with themselves.

Feel good looks great

Just Do It/Just Do Without It.

"I finally found a look that covers all my flaws."

'He was sprinting down the track, way ahead of everyone, and suddenly ... Whoa! There's the problem!'

"Oh, just picking up the pieces of my life after a really traumatic haircut."

"Mornin' Speedy."

He was a good man. She was going to miss him.