Self-care Strategist Pillows

Client-centered Therapy.

Might be time to lighten up on those collagen implants, hon.

"If I leave them in there with a bottle, I can usually get a little time for myself."

Sorry, I'll be busy washing my hair tonight

There are days, hours, ........ split seconds, when the world itself wobbles.

"He is fighting a cold, I think he is ahead on points."

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Self help acupuncture

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

Work/Life Balance

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

Take the time to do something nice for yourself. Your kids will thank you. That is, if you ever decide to have them.

Spa

Bad fake tan day.

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

Surfing the daily stress

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

Bad hair day!

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

"The bags under my eyes have combined to form some kind of face backpack."

Woman pouring perfume into her bath.

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

"Try thinking about something else."

"Instead of years of therapy, I decided to go for chocolate."

Leave your troubles in the bubbles

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

Dating is so expensive...

"You left your demons here last week."