Sedentary Lifestyle Challengers Pillows

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

"Chair looks couch potato friendly!"

'Well, this is a first †he's got repetitive motion syndrome from eating!'

"That's actually my phone. When I answer my calls I get a little bit of a workout."

"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

We never fly anywhere anymore.

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

It's on. My new favorite game show! Welcome to: Garbage, recycling or compost?! Dana from New York you can walk away with $10,000 or try to double the green! Double, please. Okay, Dana, here's your object: A takeout container from a local restaurant. Garbage, recycling or compost? Geez. I'm guessing it would depend on whether it's got some cardboard or it's fully biodegradable. Final answer? Recycling. Wrong. Garbage! I knew it. Ridicule her! You've lost your green, loser! I'm sorry. I try so ha

'If you don't plan on snacking in between meals, then why did move the fridge in here?'

"When you are done exercising your finger, the cat would like to talk to you!"

'I am a staving artist. I'm fat because all I can afford is junk food!'

The cake diet.

Use it or lose it.

'I reduce my stress with comfort food. Now none of my clothes are comfortable.'

'American, idle.'

As soon as the diet ends the lost weight returns.

'I got him for self defense. Boze eats my wife's leftovers.'

"This is doing nothing for my abs."

'Hmm...Sofa sores. This is becoming increasingly common in fat blokes.'

"Just back from lunch . . . I needed to stretch my legs."

"Obsessive complacent disorder"

Reality television programme - showing infinite regression

"So, let's see what your fitness band says today."

'Go ahead, rub it in!'

"I'm not sure that lifting the remote control is what they meant by 'taking exercise'!"

'Good luck. That patch is designed to help you stick to your diet.'

Fitness. No, thanks

"I can't tell if you're at work or at home."

"Whay do they think about all day?"