Security Installer Prints

'Morning, ma'am. I'm here to install your security system.'

The Anti-Agent

UK border controls relaxed.

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

High security Santa's grotto

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"He's a guard dog."

No Soliciting

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

"I see you've security marked your property."

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

The Scanner Of Love.

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

Shaped Much Different: Vietnam and Afghanistan.

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

Do you have a phone with recording capabilities? I want to be able to carry a wire when I meet with my boss.

'Best watchdog I ever had!'

"Beware of Don"

Scarecrows guarding a field

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

AI Safety Officer

Moulin Rouge Security

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Death to the Extremists

''Junk Yard Dog' just sounds so much cooler.'

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

A Little Extra