Secular Adventurers Pillows

"Last night, I challenged your god to a duel. I won by default because he never showed."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

An astronaut fishes in volcanoes on another planet.

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"Home depot."

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

'No, really, go ahead. You know me - I'm all about the journey, not the food pellet!'

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

'You must heal yourself.'

Christian and Born again Christian...

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

"Do you have an appointment?"

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

"Show off."

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

The Path