Seasonal Socialite Gifts

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

"Another flue shot, Larry.

Children's Party

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

Hold those deer to you near to you this Christmas.

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

'You made a complete fool of yourself at the party last night...I just hope no one knows you were sober.'

"Whoa! Wrong bar?"

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'

"Brian's considering the optics."

A day at the races

'Everyone here likes a big band, right?'

'Fill 'er up Fred!'

'Can I get you anything? Coffee? A biscuit?...A lift home?'

"This is the Upper East Side, sir. We don’t sell ‘well’ vodka."

"There's a notice from the co-op board. Would we be interested in playing softball on the Great Lawn?"

'Oh, we've met. We were once married to one another.'

"I want you two to meet some people who just bought a fabulous five-story brownstone with a garden in Troy, New York."

"Please try not to offer expert analysis."

Health organizations doubt the benefits of skiing holidays.

'Can anybody here separate their fingers and if so will you pour?'

"Either you're emitting the scent of power, or your phone battery is about to explode."

"Francophobe meet Francophile."

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

"Your party just totally blew us away."

'Dear, of course no one can tell you what they think of the wine, you haven't told them how much it cost yet.'

'Forget the artwork who made the martinis?!'

'I like the way you don't say I've had enough.'