Seafood Surealist Gifts

Octopi a la mode.

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

Mac's Bait and Sushi Shop

'I cleaned over thirty fish today.' - 'That takes guts.'

"My family has been fishing these waters for nearly 40 years. . ."

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

Your lobster was off!

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

"... Oh, don't worry, I won't 'overcook it'... I hope you like, sushi."

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

"What do you suggest...the tuna fish or the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich?"

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'Why do I need to clean the fish? -- Didn't you just take them out of the WATER?'

Sea weed harvest.

Civilized Salmon

"No, my consomme was perfect, but my husbands calamari is a little underdone."

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

Prawn Cocktail Please

"How's the salmon?"

'Diver caught scallops - is that a description of what happened or a compound adjective'

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

Fresh fish

"Oh, but we could be so good together...!"

'Catching flying fish...'

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

"I think I'll have the fish. No, wait... yes, the fish." "So many choices... what is a Reuben? Never mind, I'll have the fish, too." "I always get the same thing, but it's so good. Alright, I'll have the fish."

Thermidor Dali

"The waiter said he wouldn't recommend the octopus, so what do you order? The octopus."

'We like bright, new employees who aren't afraid to take some risks. By the way... how are those clam fritters?'

"You've got some food or something in your moustache."

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."