Seafood Delight T-Shirts

'I see you lying on a bed of ice... Have you scheduled holidays in the Arctic?'

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"The fish sticks here are very good."

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

Mac's Bait and Sushi Shop

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

"How fresh is the calamari?"

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

Your lobster was off!

'Hmphh. Happy as clams, indeed. They're just all on Prozac.'

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

"... Oh, don't worry, I won't 'overcook it'... I hope you like, sushi."

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

'Why do I need to clean the fish? -- Didn't you just take them out of the WATER?'

"What do you suggest...the tuna fish or the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich?"

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

'Fancy a liquid lunch?'

"Still, you've got to admit our being swallowed by a fish has its humorous aspects!"

"No, my consomme was perfect, but my husbands calamari is a little underdone."

"How's the salmon?"

Civilized Salmon

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

Prawn Cocktail Please

'Diver caught scallops - is that a description of what happened or a compound adjective'

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

"You've got some food or something in your moustache."

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

'Catching flying fish...'

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

'We like bright, new employees who aren't afraid to take some risks. By the way... how are those clam fritters?'

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'