Screen Size Struggler T-Shirts

"It's a new travel computer. It fits in your pocket. I suggest bringing your reading glasses."

Back to work...

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

"His father came from a family of climbers."

"How about a little more coffee?"

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

I am coffee and I need more coffee

'I see you're hacking the fridge again.'

Sad businessman with sinking profits

"The phone takes some effort to unfold completely, but the 24" screen makes it all worthwhile.

'Gravity wins - again.'

'Well, if I weigh that much after only putting one foot on, I don't think I have the courage to continue!'

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

'Sorry I'm late - My sundial didn't go off.'

"I said, can you hear me now...?!"

"Uggh! Who am I?" 'Rory Bremner wakes up with a hangover'

"Don't rush me! I won't be much of a busy bee if I don't get my second cup of coffee."

"Judging by all the hair you've pulled out of your head, I must be hard to teach technology to than I thought."

Gimme a latte, geek. In a sec. I'm watching the end of a tv show on my new cellphone. Look out, Jack! Didn't you just buy a 50-inch plasma?! Is that a man or a tree?

'It's a true real scientific fact! If I don't open my eyes, today will go away!'

'Was the class too early for you?'

"I was just... uh... looking for the low-fat yogurt."

"It's someone's turn to make the coffee..."

Monday Checklist.

Healthy Eating Fast

"...were in fact not victims but just had a really, really hard time getting out of bed this morning."

'Was the interview too early for you?'

George was not a morning person.

Computer Repairs

"I have no trouble falling asleep and I have no trouble waking up. I just need to switch when they happen."

"Oops, sorry new guy, I guess I forgot to mention he's not a morning person..."

'I'm running late again this morning...' - '...in the vain hope that somebody will fire me.' - 'Gah. My life is ridiculous.'

Monday 5:30 am

Instant human... just add coffee

'If you haven't got a low fat, organic, calorie free, ethically produced, free range option... I'll have the double chocolate cheesecake.'