Screen Scene Analyst T-Shirts

"They grow up so fast."

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

Internet Cafe.

"The DNA sample from the mink fibres found in the suspect's car matched the DNA sample from the mink coat found at the scene of the crime, so I'm thinking, maybe these minks were twins?"

Andrew Marr

"When did movies start being dumb all year round?"

'He's not hurt. He's just really, really cold.'

"So despite the strong smell of petrol you still claim that your husband, cat and budgie all spontaneously combusted?"

"I agree, it's a real worry. We may have to consider limiting her screen time."

"Have you tried oversharing deeply personal thoughts on social media to help with the phone addiction?"

"It's boy meets girl, boy and girl do everything you've seen in every other movie."

'Their offense is shifty and often ruthless. I want you to study the videotapes - especially this one showing their quarterback robbing a convenience store at gunpoint.'

Baby on ultrasound scan gazes at mobile phone

"Is there no escape from escapism?"

'Once upon a time there were some me with big sticks, and these men, they said to everyone else...'

"Brick, Eh? Well, sorry to blow your house down but these days it's not wise to be so invested in stability."

Film Casting Co.

"Who do you want to talk to? The man in charge, or the woman who knows what's going on."

"Even this wouldn't have been enough to keep the youth from their smartphones."

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

'The killer should not be hard to find - he has left a trail of inserts.'

'Never mind WHOdunit - HOWdunnit?'

MD-HDTV

Clouds in Bath

"I've been thinking about your bedtime story, and something doesn't make sense."

Television content warning.

"Too much beige."

"Should we watch the lighthearted workplace comedy or the dystopian workplace drama?"

"Can you not stare at your phone when I'm talking?"