Scone Aficionado Pillows

"I thought you said I'd have to pull the sword from a scone!"

"I'm thinking of suing your cafe. I just got a $2,000 dental bill. You should be paying for it." "I'm in here every day and I always order your sugary scones and your sugar-filled lattes." "That's why I had twelve cavities!" "I'll settle out of court for a scone and a latte." "No deal."

Scones Hot Line

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'Have you been 'helping the environment by supporting local produce' again?'

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

French wine

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."

Beer Stall

Secretive Weigh In.

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

Cheese

Happy thoughts

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

'No, really, go ahead. You know me - I'm all about the journey, not the food pellet!'

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

"Whine and cheezed party."

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'Pepperoni: Muse of Pizza'

Joyce could certainly handle her drink!

You know, the snowballs we get in the summer are better. They're flavored!

'This must be heaven, because you sure look like an angel....'

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

Sm. Pepperoni & Mushroom Cloud

'The following programme contains scones of a sexual nature.'

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

'Hey, there are pedals on this thing!'

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"