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"Hold that thought. I have to go take a number five."

'Oh, this is just great... Now how am I going to get a Wi-Fi connection?'

"This plaque shows nine planets, but their transmissions say their system has eight."

"Gee, I don't know...I guess if I had to choose between you I'd say Jerry's formula has the most hideous side effects."

"Oh dear, it's just as we suspected.. they do come from another planet."

'So it's decided - we'll put the clocks back 5 years and everything will be fine again.'

'In case you were wondering why the doctor plays computer games all day. . . He is actually controlling me.'

'Hi, I'm calling to check to see if 'alien attack' is covered on my auto insurance...'

Woman: 'I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you before!'

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

'Don't worry they normally look like little humas during the early scans.'

'I'm an out-of-network provider."

'The Existential Files.'

'Scrub that previous message Houston. There is no, I repeat no intelligent life on Mars.'

To his dismay, Captain Kirk stumbles upon a Vulcan handsign-to-English translation website,

"I come from a hundred years in the future to warn you that nothing really changes in the next hundred years."

'The computer is claiming its intelligence is real, and ours is artificial.'

"It's seven billion life forms talking about themselves."

"What a ripoff. We'll refuel at the next rest stop."

"Let's stop and ask directions at Alpha Centauri, I said, but oh no, Mister clever stalks knows the way alright!"

"Oh no - a ciderman"

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

"That must have been the paradigm shift."

Woman looking at apples in a grocery store with labels that say "Apples", "Genetically modified apples" and "Mutant apples from outer space".

"Trying to raise a family, establish a career AND invade a planet? It's no wonder you feel stressed-out."

'He kept trying to hit me with this thing ... so I vaporized him.'

"One CC of lubricant after meals, okay?"

Another tense night of contract bridge ahead.

'I guess they're not here for contact.'

'Time for your yearly rectal exam.'

"Wait a moment... we came first."

"Sure, they're handy little things to have around, but you can't deny they're potentially dangerous."

'You're kidding! Your leader is a male!'

'Our sensors indicate that this planet's surface is 78% water and the remainder is landfill containing mostly plastics.'

"I wanna thank everyone who believed in me!"