Sci-fi Diner Prints

How To Turn A Closed-Down Nuclear Reactor Into A Theme Restaurant: A Master Plan.

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"For drinks or dinner?"

Maitre d' to astronaut couple entering restaurant: 'Gravity or no-gravity?'

"Fresh pepper?"

'Would Sir & Madam per chance care to peruse the scratch & sniff dessert menu?'

"The gods are distributing Chinese menus."

"Sorry no half portions - at least that's the quantum theory."

"It's the Chef Surprise."

'I'm afraid the Chef's Surprise today is that he ran off with one of the waitresses.'

"Would you mind telling me why you keep hitting a scary-music sound bite every time you pick up your steak knife?"

UFO = Unidentified frying object.

'I'm sorry the cod was not as good as when you came a month ago. It should have been - it was the same fish...'

'It probably wasn't a good idea to ask for seperate cheques.'

'Please have the bouncer throw me out before the dessert course.'

'I'm not very hungry after eating my first quarter losses.'

"Who had the rainforest vinaigrette?"

'These are my dieting glasses. They magnify the food so I think I'm eating more than I really am.'

"I'm supposed to sing you the specials. Do you want me to do that?"

Kirks & Tacos

"Freshly ground Ozempic?"

"It's nothing new. We've always offered a complimentary beard wash following an order of ribs."

"I'm sorry it's not what you ordered, but the chef works in mysterious ways."

The first in-flight meal: "Care for some soup?"

"I hear the sparrow-goldfish chowder is to die for...at least once."

"The book, How to Serve Man! It's. . . It's a cook book, filled with recipes that use MSG and transfats!"

Theories expounded

"What kind of mod are you in? Sit Down or All You Can Eat From The Trough?"

The food was nice...but something was missing.

"Yes sir, this is half a steak. The guest who had it yesterday wasn't very hungry."

'It would never work out, Harry -- I'm wine and cheese, and you're beer and pretzels.'

'The chef says that the quail was out but he prepared that little critter he ran over on the motorway which tastes similar and you nouveau riche snobs will never notice the difference anyway.'

Pretty Soon: Bioengineering will produce livestock which requires less processing.

"We're all dying to try something that you set on fire at our table."