School Rebel Supporter Gifts

'And the coolest dad of the year award goes to... Dr. Armstrong for his note, 'to whom it may concern, my son is allergic to homework'.'

"Have you been on the moon again, young man?"

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

Thinks he's too cool for school.

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

'What are the other nonconformists wearing this year?'

I was thinking about the implications of your brave effort last week to unionize. I didn't really. I was role-playing. Whatever. Do you realize the demise of unions has coincided with a massive decline in the middle class? What? I'm helping chickens cross a road on my iPhone. I'm taking about the income gap! Talkin' 'Bout the Income Gap is sponsored by: The makers of signs, placards, and other protest equipment.

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

Computer Class.

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

'Tommy's doing fine. I'm concerned about your poor fund-raising record. You sold only two magazine subscriptions and one measly candy bar.'

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

"She's the best nit nurse this school has ever seen."

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

'I wasn't playing hooky -- I was fleeing the deteriorating public school system.'

Cat protests, with sign reading 'Legalise catnip!'.

"Well, if the test is multiple choice I choose not to take it."

"So basically you're telling us that you make the youngest of your species sit in a room for twelves years and that is an education. . . you're kidding, right?"

"I attempted to circumvent the traditional trappings of a teen furlough...but I was thwarted by my czar-ish parental unit."

"Mom, Dad, college changed me."

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.

"Do I get to lawyer up before I see the Principal?"

'It's someone from the Society for Ethical Treatment of Principals asking for a donation.'

'If you do not stop smudging, I'm getting a new cartoonist.'

'Boasting bumper stickers.'

'I'm Stacey, whose mother is the proud parent of an honor student.'

'At least you won't have to worry about the rising costs of a college education.'

"Actually, I'm tired of the man trying to shape our minds so they fit into some pre-arranged societal widget."

'You got everyfink Bruv? Stink bombs, pea shooter, dead frogs . . .'

'Going to school is NOT an abusive relationship!'