School Dynamics Observer Pillows

PTA Meeting Tonight: Parents,Teachers,Attorneys

'We're no longer called 'Children', we're called 'Age Disadvantaged'!'

"This position has become very important to the company."

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

"Now the geeks hold all the power. They're the ones who know how to forge a parent's e-signature."

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

"Ma'am, why don't you go ahead of me?" "Um... no thanks. Let's let this gentleman go ahead of us." "Oh, no... you ladies go right ahead!"

"God help us, it's that guy."

"In obedience school, I was voted 'Most likely to chew a slipper'."

'If your cell phone has five hundred minutes, and you use one of them during this class, how long will you be in detention?'

The new boy was teased for being different.

Stable boys and Scottsman

"I think deep down he's really pleased the union has a female head for the first time..."

"He claims to be self aware but he clearly can't read a room."

"Certainly. A party of four at seven-thirty in the name of Dr. Jennings. May I ask whether that is an actual medical degree or a Ph.D.?"

'Boy, look at his personal space!'

'Could I see you after class?'

Poplar Trees/Not very Poplar Trees.

'Here's a list of women I want you to stay away from at the party tonight.'

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

'He can call whoever he wants, she's still not parking that thing in my classroom!'

Soccer Moms

"My gut instinct was to say yes. . . but years in social work have shown me how these things end up working out."

'So what if people are watching you. Aren't you also looking at them?'

"Oh, God, it's the Herefords, pretend we don't see them."

"I tried talking to the principal about what I’d be teaching next semester, but he kept changing the subject."

"Have you considered that your anger has something to do with the company you keep?"

"His ability to shoulder all the blame makes him irreplaceable."

"Do you think everyone hangs out with me because I'm cool and funny, or because I'm God."

Servant talking to her old master about her new position

"I can't believe it's another day closer to the end of school. This is the saddest time of the year. At least until tomorrow...then that will be the saddest time of the year."

"Don't preted to hibernate when I'm talking to you."

Conglomerates

"Ms. Sims and I have known each other for quite some time, but it turns out we aren't on a first-name basis."