Scatterbrain Conqueror Pillows

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Rage.

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

Second lifeReal life.

Just call me Picasso!

"Whoa! Was that today?"

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

"Damn it, Gwendolyn, you know when you married me I only moved one square at a time."

"Stop! Information overload. I need to rebuffer."

Minister Starts at a New Church

"Stop staring"

"Men just won't leave me alone!"

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

Painter's Duel.

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

Delighted worker being propelled through the air on the back of the scale coming right off the chart

"Ok, let's sneak up on Mr. Canvas and see if we can make a good impression."

'My right brain isn't working.'

"Frank?"

Computer Gamers.

"There you are!"

The brain cell that was suppose to help me remember.

"Yes! I defeated the invading forces! I am master and commander... I am a warlord!"

Artist paints UNDO icon onto canvas.

'The mARTyr'

'Here's a twist. Before you go on your quest, an insurance salesman tries to sell you life insurance. If you buy a lot you can date prettier girls.'

'Unfortunately, he's very productive in paintings, not money.'

"I've lost my keys, my wallet and my iPhone! Frankly, I think MINE is the lost generation!"

"Dear diary, what the heck did you do with my car keys?!"

Abstract painter

Fancy portrait of the gentleman who killed the greatest number of small birds. [To be hung up in all sparrow clubs]