Sardonic Music Lover Mugs

"You'll be in charge of the music down here."

'All we can do is hope for identity theft.'

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

Fish eating smaller fish in a tank.

'You know what'll do wonders for you? A nose job.'

"He's So Your Type."

'Money, that's what seperates us from the apes.'

Targets

Man falls off perch

T.S. Eliot calendar.

'Tortoise stampede! But finish your picnic, folks - plenty of time.'

'Sure that money - detecting app works. It detected you had money didn't it?'

Two books from the crime passionel section in a library having sex

Special Place in Hell...

'While 10-15 years of cellaring are recommended and would certainly improve the bouquet and taste, no, there'sno reason why you can't go out back, behind the dumpster and down the whole thing in 1 chug.'

"I never do as I say. That's the beauty of a hypocritical oath."

"I'm sorry Gerald but all those orgasms were 'fake news'."

"My compliments to whoever opened the can."

"Take some identification with you in case you die."

'Don't get me wrong - hell is awful, but it could be so much more hellish. We have much to learn from them.'

"Nothing much. Reading a book by some dead white female."

"You never see a fish down here. I wonder if they know something we don't know."

"And do you get a shooting pain between your eyes?"

'You may experience some discomfort.'

Hearse on an emergency

'Come on, just a few more. I need to boost my metabolism.'

"But a deep sense of grievance and indignation IS my Happy Place."

"Can you see it, Bob? Green grass, warm breeze, flip flops. . . spring is coming!"

"No, it's not a foreclosure. It's my 'Going out of business sale!' Everything must go!"

"Just look at that. The face that lunched on a thousand chips."