Sarcastic Santa Fan T-Shirts

'Ho, ho, hum.'

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

Another day at work would be one too many...

"I'm sorry, but my costs were way out of control."

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Elfie Stick

'How's the gene-splicing going? Cloned any new hepatitis antibodies?'

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

Santa in the Sky: Happy Holidays!

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

A Creature WAS Stirring

North Pole twinned with Amazon

"Well, here he is. He just grew on me until I couldn't stand it anymore."

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

"I noticed a few browns."

Merry Christmas

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

For instance, a $25 delivery charge. You'd clean up right there.

Men working (part time).

Pole dancers

'After a Gadzillon glasses of milk and cookies who wouldn't have an upset stomach?'

'Awww, isn't that nice: This one says 'PS: Love to Rudolph!''

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.

"I've made a terrible mistake."

Santa uses his interviewing skills on his second job, too.

'Naughty? Nice? Santa, I don't deal in absolutes.'

Attorney At Law: Today's special - Bankruptcy and Divorce. Two for the price of one.