Sandwich Fan Mugs

'I'm not going out for lunch. I packed one today.'

Patio Melt

"We're following Carrot Top."

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

'I'm going to make a batch of my ginger biscuits.'

Apple Pie Abduction

Church Basement Foodie

The Da Vinci Cod

"A wise choice sir! Aah. . . Da Vinci - a genius of the Renaissance and a man who changed the face of art forever! Would you like that as a bookmark, a pencil sharpener or a fridge magnet. . . ?"

You're my Venus

"What did Jesus order?"

Pie Charts, Inc.

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

'I really don't know why we bother coming here - the food's always crap.'

Flan-eating bacteria

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

"I'd better get going. I've got a lot coming at me right now."

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

"When we asked you to paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, Michaelangelo, we were hoping you'd snazz it up."

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

'Are you ready to be patronised yet?'

"Another selfie, Rembrandt?"

Wow. Worst Tunnel of Love ever.

"I don't really think you're cut out for this job..."

Rembrandt's Selfies

"I'm not loitering officer, I 'm waiting for the next renaissance!"

'Pardon me, M'sieur -- Did you order 'grilled cheese' or 'chilled grease'?'

"If you can't see the sea I can recommend an optician in the High Street."

'I'll take the S. O. S. breakfast special...hold the shingle.'

"There's our cure for the munchies! Gluten, we love your pizza!!" "You're our hero, gluten."

Sign: 'Gerrards Cross - Owens Volley'.

"It's funny. . . I know it's the renaissance, but I keep writing dark ages on my checks!"

"I like blueberry, but still think the custard's funnier."