Sales Satire Fan Pillows

'At least, the customers still remember our company, our products and me...'

'Yes, I know our ad said that no salesman would call -- my boss says I'm no salesman.'

'Well, you don't like the contract terms, you don't like the prices, you don't think that you need our products in general... hmmm. Maybe I can convince you with a hook right into your face?!'

Salesman caught by irate customer.

"Looks like we found the issue."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

Director/Action Man toy.

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

Fabrique en Francais (Made in France).

'The staff is being reduced. The exit strategy will be explained at a meeting to be held, after work, in the parking lot.'

'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'

What's normal?

Boss to worker taking out wallet: 'It's only fair, Pete. Last year, we shared profits!'

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

"Actually, the district office is getting better results with a fresh garlic bagel."

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

'Upset at you for breaching the non-compete? Of course not.'

The Working Woman's Magazine

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

"The Chicken: Just another body type that shouldn't be permitted to wear yoga pants."

'I heard the Board was talking about kicking you, but I don't know if it's upstairs or out.'

'No matter how cynical I become, I can't keep up.'

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fundraiser."