Sage Sojourner Gifts

'Uh, we do have tenure, don't well?

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

'I don't think of my skin as saggy...I think of it as relaxed-fit!'

"I've been having stomach problems. I sit on the bathroom for 30 minutes in the morning...and a half-hour in the evening."

"Is it just me, right, is it just me ...?"

"Never mind 'what does it all mean?' What does anything mean?"

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

The Scenic Route

"Yeah, well, we've all got baggage."

"You think the food is bad, wait till you hear the pilot's jokes."

'I don't know - asceticism just doesn't seem like ENOUGH any more,'

'Money can't buy friendship.'-'Neither can poverty.'

'I'm good. How are you?'

Vast Wasteland Ahead

"But aside from the lycanthropy, things have been pretty O.K."

Soho walking society

An enlightenment seeker heads back from Truth lookign shocked.

'Becoming enlightened fifteen minutes before I did doesn't EITHER give you seniority!'

"How would I know what 'the meaning of life' is...? I was hoping you were mountain rescue!"

"Always stay rooted, or you'll turn into a tumbleweed..."

'I'd like to spend November and December in a nice vegetarian country!'

"Forget it - I've tried it before, and cats can't be enlightened."

Moses Lost in the Desert....Year 40

'Very very uplifting this morning, Reverend!'

Flight attendant looking out a lighted window.

"Mostly been praising Krishna a lot."

"This rush-rush life is getting old. Sometimes, I think about moving back to the land where I way born. What do you think, Baldo? What would you miss the most?"

The Vicar in Customs

Priests on plane - "We must be near head office."

'Why didn't you take the elevator?'

"If you have to ask, you can't understand the answer."

"Of course - we wait forever, then come at the same time,"