Rush Hour Diner Mugs

"OK, now the chef suggests you eat faster."

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

'The customer is always right...'

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

'Yes, all our flambe dishes come with injury, liability insurance.'

'I'm afraid things are rather confused around here today, sir- the Soup of the Day is a grilled-cheese sandwich'

"There's a free pudding for whoever finds the Chef's glass eye."

'Waiter...!' (there is a human in my soup)

'I don't leave until I've heard all 25 songs.'

'If that is a toenail, it is a French toenail.'

"To prevent any complaints like "when will our ordered food be served" guests can now follow the work in the kitchen on TV."

Man eating his meal with his feet.

"Dinner looks delicious."

Road Kill Cafe.

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

"There are no animal products in our dishes, but since the meals are prepared by animals, you may find some stray hairs."

Menu.

'Make up your mind, M'sieur — a hundred years from now, what difference will it make what you had for lunch today?'

'You don't need a menu here, mate. If you can't see it on my apron, we don't sell it.'

That Lazy Susan's not so lazy if you spin it a liiitle bit faster...

"Bring me something impaled on a tusk."

"You forgot the straw."