Rural Joke Collector Pillows

'Who needs apps?'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

The Rooster Comedian.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Suffering from Cooties?

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

Job Vacancy: Human cannonball. Applicants must of the right calibre

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

Useless add-ons.

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

Irritable trowel syndrome.

"I know my drinking limits.The problem is that I can never reach them - I simply fall down."

I fart more than that!

'Why would anyone order a pint of stoat?'

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

Told you...Nonsense compulsive disorder.

My daddy ate my homework

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

Mexican Jumping Balls.

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

Cheating Death.

Shark infested custard!

Man takes picutre of other man holding up huge worm at Bait Shop.