Royalty Reflection Pillows

"Good question. Yes, we have your best interests at heart."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

'You can just forget about the cake.'

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

King George I

'How about a game of cards?'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'The Burrito King.'

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"The overthinker"

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Czarcasm

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"She wishes to range free!"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

TV jester.

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

Princess Anne

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'The King of what?'