Royalty Admirers Pillows

"And to think he started in accounting."

Sedan chair has fluffy dice in it.

"If we finance your army will you promise not to attack the bank?"

'Hello, Disneyland? -- I'd like to talk to somebody about political asylum.'

'I still don't know how you got a booking here Bryan.'

'Must you have chirps with everything?'

Excuse me for staring, but we don't see a lot of royalty around here.

Best Guards.

"I'm not sure he could handle ANOTHER stag night."

Coventry Carol

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Now that's an afro!'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Knight Golfing

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

King George I

"She wishes to range free!"

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

Czarcasm

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'Gerry just can't seem to relax on holiday.'

'You've made a powerful enemy'

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"He's a guard dog."

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"