Royal Consultants Pillows

'Actually, I'm between reigns right now.'

"It is we."

King completes rubik's cube.

Reign Man

"Friend or foe?"

'I'm not saying he's unpopular, but the Secret Service won't let me wear spike heels.'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

The King In The Rain.

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

'We don't need helicopter vision, Manfred. We need a helicopter.'

'Do you have an appointment?'

'I need three estimates before I appoint an estate agent.' - 'Right, £120,000, £130,000 and £140,000.'

'If you want to get anywhere with girls, you gotta PRETEND to like bunnies, ponies, and kittens.'

'From left to right: witchfinder general, jester jocular and spouse peculiar.'

"And then at 3 you have a meeting with the royal pain in the butt."

'Having conducted a comprehensive review of your business strategy and financial forecasts...'

"Due to the financial state of the kingdom were turning the castle into a Bed & Breakfast & Ransom."

Box sold: 'I told you the property market was improving.'

'A whoopee cushion! — I'll bet Karl Rove is behind this somewhere!'

'Don't blame the King, Ma'am. This was all his divorce lawyer's idea.'

Estate Agents

'Coming up! One meal, fit for a King!'

"I told you 'Attila' wasn't a girl's name."

"Swipe left." Henry VIII

'Although we've vanquished the invaders from Paperland, we really should have allied with them for the impending attack on us by Rockland!'

'Nepotism may not be perfect, but it's the best system anybody's come up with so far.'

Estate agents lined up for sale during house-price slump.

'Sorry about the war, folks - I was off my meds.'

Prince William and Kate Middleton

King Charles III's coronation

"What - my own fortune teller?! Well, that was predictable..."

Election Policies

"You might try avuncular."