Roswell History Gifts

"Heelllllooooooo, Roswell!!"

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

Alien Assumption

'Oh dear, what a shame - It's raining again, Pam!'

Two wheels good, four wheels bad.

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

"Gosh, it's hot in Roswell!"

"Hibernate sounds better than binge watch."

Phone Mittens

"You were right, Louis. . . I was cold before, but now it's warm and toasty."

The Enemies Within? They're the Boys in Blue

Big Bird Brother

Remember, what happens in Roswell, stays in Roswell.

"Hey Ed, take a look at this...more sleigh bells...what is this thing?"

Big Charmer Is Watching

'My friend went to Roswell and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.'

"I've got a lap dog and a laptop cat."

Beach

'It's a rare generic defect. To put it bluntly, you have no brand loyalty.'

Cook for 3 minutes stir, wait 30 years to discover if the contaminated ingredient gives you stomach cancer.

Theory #243 on how fossils were made.

"Hi honey! How was Roswell?"

'Try not to jerk when you come to the end of the rope.'

Cleaning service on skates.

Weight Loss Clinic: 100% guaranteed.

What Started the Incident at Roswell

"Oh, wow....this is cool! What are you making?"

Scary Marshmallow Campfire Stories.

GPs asked to solve rising obesity levels..."I read in the papers that I'm fat and you've got to sort it out!"

'Murdock oversleeps every day - He's always an accessory AFTER the fact.'

George Orwell.

'When you get up at night, be careful not to fall in the fishhole.'

The War Against Imagination