Room Layout Enthusiast Pillows

"Jack sensed that Susan was planning to rearrange the furniture again."

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

"Don't tell me, first time away from home, right?"

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

"How much?! Blimey, to get my money's worth, I'd need to use it EVERY WEEK!"

Sunday P.M. July 15, 1990 in the Watternods' Living Room with the Watternods' Dog and Mr. Wu Lung's Cat from Next Door

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

"All your throw pillows were in knots."

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

You dope! Why would you build our home right next to a power plant?

"I aways thought it would be stylish to live in a house with high ceilings."

'Oh, honey, what a lovely house... We'll place the couch here, the cupboard there and my psychiatrist right here!'

'We'll take it!'

"I need an apartment just big enough for a laptop, a coffee cup, and me."

'It's a new concept, the inside out house.'

"The mirrors really do make this apartment look bigger."

"That's still too high"

Angry boss

"Sir, there are no waitresses or menus — this is Crate & Barrel."

"They're exactly the same, except in Hell you have to put on your own duvet cover."

Love Seats.

'I don't like the painting either, but it is part of our corporate culture.'

"I don't know what to do anymore! Our new carpet was really expensive but so was the dog!"

"Bird of paradise, my ass."

"If you haven't got a TV, what do you point your furniture at?"

"Quick mommy, call Sothebys."

'Impressive screen, but doesn't it put you off your tea?'

Alien with flying spaceships on wall instead of flying ducks

"Frank?"

"Love the exposed chessboard."

"The distressed-style wood flooring we installed in the kitchen seems to have crept into Fred!"

'So this is a kitchen!'

"You should be happy. How many husbands even notice window treatments?"