Room Conversion Mugs

"What's my laptop. Your old room is now the computer room."

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

The bluebird of happiness couldn't make it. I'm the finch of eh, I can't complain.

'Cleanliness is next to 'clean room' in the dictionary. Look it up.'

"Like you, I was lost...then I found Jesus!"

Couch and Potato

"All your throw pillows were in knots."

"You like it? We purchased the fourth wall from 'Westworld'."

You will always find a spot to garden

Alien characters on boy's wallpaper come to life to play with him.

'Is your cap on tight? We don't want any more accidents in the bed, do we?'

Woman crushed under satin sheets.

"My parents call it a blanket hanging from my ceiling. I call it a giant privacy filter."

'Don't say it! You're going to ask me if I notice anything different in here.'

"At least you have taste when it comes to your computer's wallpaper."

Futons/Futoffs

'Yep. I used to use chemical to strip wallpaper, but the cats are more efficient, and there's no nasty smell.'

Football addict

'Now we've had our loft changed into a bedroom, the vicar's preaching to the converted.'

'Neat photo Lucy, I'll put it up in my room... Do you have any drawing pins?'

The trouble with memory foam beds.

"After Harry was gone I started decorating the house as a distraction. It was around the time I was wallpapering the driveway that I thought I should seek grief counseling."

"What do you have that's bigger than 'king'?"

Memory Foam Mattress.

'Nice decorating. I like the clothes and toys everywhere...and the half eaten sandwich really ties it all together!'

Billy's clean room.

"When your memory foam mattress forgets."

"The only spells she does anymore are the Gospels."

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

New Electric Car

And it stores easily under your bed...

"After the kids moved out I turned their space into a guest room."