Romcom Realist Mugs

"Will you get this guy outta here! If I hear 'real life ain't a Hallmark movie' one more time..."

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

Stand-up Romcom

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

"I can't wait to introduce you to all the people I used to be friends with, before I started spending all my time with you."

'I want to finish with him, but I'll have to wait until he's made the final payment on my engagement ring.'

"I think I should tell you, I'm CGI."

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

"Well, you were late and her boyfriend didn't turn up for their wedding, so....."

'Let's go to your place. I cook, I clean and then we can have a meaningful shag.'

"Your press kit said you were lots of fun."

"I hope I'm not embarrassing you, Elaine... I guess I've always been a fool for love."

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

'I'm sorry, Jason. I don't date anyone new until I've googled them.'

"I don't love you anymore, Barry, but I still think you're a great American."

'I do...with reservations.'

"I hope you love me for my money, not for who I am."

"Hold on—I'm getting information as to why these two should not be wed."

OMG UR HOT

Noughts and crosses hugging and kissing.

'Goodbye, dear. This is the kind of day that makes you feel glad to be alive.'

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

'CHICK-FLICK' MALE LEAD CHARACTER ARC.

The point in every relationship, when annoying habits become intolerable...

'And the winner of the 'biggest loser in love' category is...'

"What do you mean I never take you anywhere? We're here, aren't we?"

'Perhaps we should leave details of the divorce settlement until after we are married.'

The sperm and the egg: romance in action

"We got him onto an exercise bike, but I'm afraid it was too late."

'And do you, Desiree, take plan B to be your lawfully wedded...'

'Will you marry me if I can get funding?'

"You never chase me through back yards anymore."

"Happy anniversary, dear. How about a second honeymoon?" "Sure. Who with?"

"I appreciate couples therapy, but I can't stop fantasizing about group therapy."