Romance Humorists T-Shirts

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

"Puss in cement boots"

'Well, thanks, but we have no need of a Divorce Lawyer: We're Lovebirds you see...'

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

"Yo, Ned Beatty, paddle harder if you ever want to kiss me again."

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

When at a loss for words Colin would often resort to communicating through the medium of contemporary dance.

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

Tunnel of Temporary Infatuation

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

"What's with the Tim Russert act?"

'The way we met was interesting. I opened my wallet and there she was!'

Always Compatible