Romance Alchemist Gifts

CARBON DATING: 'Now let me see, we can do a one night stand with 2 oxygens, a long weekend with 4 hydrogens or a same sex carbon orgy.'

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

Carbon Dating.

"I hope he has skeletons in his closet."

Periodic table for two. Chez LMN't

Barman In Love.

"Well, I finally figured out why we were going to the vet so often for check ups! He finally plucked up the courage to ask her out!"

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

"I know what you're thinking - all I am to you is a vector."

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

Pheromones.

"What I mean is what do you do with yourself all day?"

"I'll give you my unconditional love - on one condition."

"I don't love you anymore, Barry, but I still think you're a great American."

"The best place to make black hole discoveries is in the bedroom."

'First date with a logician - These venn Diagrams will save us a lot of time. We'll see where you fit in, where I fit in, and if any of it overlaps'

Deconstructionist girlfriend

The point in every relationship, when annoying habits become intolerable...

"When you said you like to experiment in the bedroom..."

'I think that's enough brain defragging for today.'

'Relax babe, that's me before the operation,'

"You never chase me through back yards anymore."

'Perhaps we should leave details of the divorce settlement until after we are married.'

"The great thing about a science background is I can understand what you're experiencing in biochemical terms."

'Will you marry me if I can get funding?'

Single men in Tahiti

Love and temptation go hand in hand...

"Happy anniversary, dear. How about a second honeymoon?" "Sure. Who with?"

'You are crazy, but in a NICE way.'

"It's less of a spell than it is a signature scent."

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

"I appreciate couples therapy, but I can't stop fantasizing about group therapy."

"Look, hon, I know both of our schedules have been crazy, but I still think we should take time out to consummate our marriage."

Prozac, Lexapro and Lithium.

'This is George, my divorce lawyer from a previous marriage.'