Robots Pillows

"They don't appear to want to take over. They just want to dance."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

"Sorry, but we left your heart in San Francisco."

'Oh, God I have to talk to a *****! Human!'

'You know when I was a kid, I really thought we'd have flying robot maids by now.'

"Who do you want to replace when you grow up?"

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

Turing Test Today

In their secret campaign to enslave humanity, the machines make their first big misstep with Artificial Sincerity.

'This school does have a bit of a problem with cyberbullying.'

Robot surgery.

Ascent of Machine.

"Seriously, this doesn't have you the slightest bit worried?"

Where steel wool comes from.

'If it upsets you, don't read it.'

"Nice to put a face with a call."

It had taken a team of engineers at IBM over a decade and had cost more than 50 million dollars, but that nigh, when Eat-Bot 4000 finally broke the record for hot dogs in an hour, it was all worth it.

"Et tu, Killbot 9000?"

'Employee drug testing has gone too far.'

"Remember how big and clunky the first ones were?"

"Not only does this solve the problem of teacher shortages. . . but what kid wouldn't want a cool robot teacher?"

"I'm your therapy robot, Mr. Berkowitz. My role is to help people with technology phobias."

'That's a million correct answers in a row!'

"One CC of lubricant after meals, okay?"

'I want a brain, but I'd settle for buns of steel!'

"Well, here's the problem. Someone changed the greeting control from 'curt nod' to 'hug.'"

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

Brian meets his new coworker, and wonders if they have anything in common. (offcie worker meeting a robot)

'Hello, Robotaxi Cab Company?! I think one of your drivers has a screw loose!!!'

"Hello, Mr. Burnham? I won't be in today -- I have a bad code."

'Eddie, take it from me...invest in robotics.'

'You are hereby sentenced to be rebooted.'

"A robot took over my job, so they let me go. But then the robot got promoted and hired me back."

Artificial hearts.

'I know. Nobody likes this part of the exam, but if you'll just bend over, I'll check your oil.'