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"How ironic."

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

Can I have a look at the map?

'And here's the toolkit.'

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

'I'm happy to report our use of air sickness bags has declined sharply since we quit serving meals.'

"We'd wanted to adopt for years, and then along came this absolutely adorable little roundabout."

"I'm going to Bognor next year!"

Slow, Men at Work.

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

'Told you so.'

'Don't tell me you weren't speeding back there. When you drove by me, all I could see was a blur.'

Man with Stop Signs.

The Leaning Tower of Pizza

'We're not going to Roswell again, it's such a tourist trap.'

Alfredo the knife thrower's first air trip.

"Whether I have five passengers or five hundred, I try to make the same inane announcements."

"We find the defendants guilty on the charges of missed connections, separated seats, crying babies, bad weather, turbulence and running out of chicken."

"I've just had my panel 5 beaten...."

De-Caf Drivers Right Lane Only

How come Mercury gets the car pool lane? He's alone and we've got all these moons!

"There's a gender neutral toilet under the bed."

'You want to go somewhere really hot - that can be arranged.'

'Finally!'

Hamlet, Chicken of Denmark: 'to cross, or not to cross'

Uh Oh...

Gift shop in casino caters to winners and losers.

Excess Baggage: By the end of your cruise vacation, your clothes seem to have shrunk for no reason.

'Remember our last cruise The porthole is not a wall safe,'

Sat Nag

H.M.Customs 'Nothing to declare' 'Articles to declare' 'Genius to declare'

'Steve says Air Canada may ban cats from some of their flights... I'm not unhappy! There wasn't that much leg room.'

'Maybe now you'll admit that we're lost!?'