Risotto T-Shirts

"Just a heads-up, the Mushroom and Crab Risotto doesn't like its photo taken."

A Symphony of Penguins

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

Omara Portuondo

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Anthropologists discover the earliest known depiction of Jazz Hands.

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

The Teen Years of A Red Delicious.

'I'm too hot to trot.'

Balancing two espresso martinis

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

Swing dancers.

'After hours of rehearsing together, little Judy Barlow is going to play 'Three Blind Mice' while her father screams, 'Keep that racket down, will ya?''

Statue is moved to hold up the leaning tower of Pisa.

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

"Lemon 'merengue' pies"

'Some of these traditions don't half linger on.'

'We are so in sync!'

Cello Concert

Berta screams out!

"You're doing fine - don't watch your feet."

'I'm sure I could lie on my back waving my feet in the air if I could play the saxophone.'

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

Fear and Loathing in Hi-Fi Land.

"A gentleman would offer his seat."

"If you are a Democrat, Mrs. Hooper-Smith does the Macarena during your pancakes."

'Coleridge'

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

"Well, I didn't have any more wall space, and I was also tired of being bald."

'Oh I don't mind you turning over my cups to look at the mark. But next time, please finish your tea.'