Risk-taking Renovator Gifts

House Painter gets stuck to the ceiling.

Ladder Painting

"It's the first responders wondering when you'll be needing their services this weekend..."

"Things got heated with the Morgans. I may have wagered our car. You're up."

'Yeah, the job's got great benefits, but mainly I like the safe work environment.'

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

"And they say it's the safest 500-P/E stock out there."

The Old Woman was thrilled to bits with her shoestring budget makeover!!

We'll take a carpenter, painter, plumber...

"Well, you could wish for a new kitchen and a bathroom renovation; or alternatively you could just wish for a less idle husband."

'I know it's daring, but I always try one new recipe for Thanksgiving dinner.'

"What ever happened with that old shack you bought in the woods? You were going to rehab and flip it."

"When does the improvement part of this improvement project kick in?"

Homes for sale - some assembly required.

"We're thinking Shag Carpet. I'm tired of hardwood floors."

'Oh yes, Leomard's a fixit-it man. Only problem is, who'll fix it after him?'

'I know it's hard to believe, but before this, I'd never built a thing!'

DIY Disaster.

'I love doing surprise inspections.'

DIY store with a first aid department

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. VII

Sundayafternoon Carpenters

'Probably left here my the decorators, as I was saying, the roof is watertight.'

"Do me a favor. . . stick to changing the wallpaper that's on your computer."

"Ah, here you are... I see you made the mistake of tasting your own cooking."

"Hey, look at this. After only a month, the idea that we spend the last two years developing has attracted $10 on Kickstarter."

"Perkins, I didn't get where I am today without taking a few risks."

"It's a quote from the builder, he's wanting £900 just to come around and sneer at us!"

' I hope this adds a little enjoyment for you. '

Travel Agents

"That'll teach you for buying cheap paintbrushes!!"

"To be an alpha male, little buddy, you've got to live like you've got nothing left to lose."

"You were right. He loves it."

Risk Management Hut.

"Dad's shingling the roof and mom says she's inches away to an insurance claim that will change her life."