Retro Beats Fan Gifts

'I still love those classic solos from the 70s - but who has the time?'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

"Wheel, schmeel—check these babies out!"

'I'm too hot to trot.'

Gramophone dreams of mp3 player.

Old rocker.

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

"I'm just saying, maybe we wouldn't need the swords if we didn't wear these clothes."

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

"Do you do much walking?"

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

Draw!

'What was the first music they ever said 'this isn't even music' about?'

Punk rocker passing punk codger in street.

Disco Owls

"The next song is for all you unreconstructed commies, who are still in love with their tractors."

The Four Tops in Concert

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

An Old-Timer/An Old Codger/An Old Geezer

"Bah! in my day bands knew how to play their computers properly. Like Kraftwerk"

'Sir, we need to upgrade our technology. We've used up our last roll of ticker tape.'

"Now that I've invented it, I have-this odd compulsion to hold it in my hand whenever I go and glance at it incessantly."

'If you don't want to go digital, fine, but if you're going to store film in our cooler you have to save room some soda and beer."

"I just don't know what we'd have done without our subscription these past 25 years."

'No, the big rabbit Harvey isn't Paul Harvey -- at least I don't THINK he is.'

Elephant in Headphones

We choose to send a cow to the moon and do the other things. Not because they are hard, but because it'll be darn funny!

Ronald was born to Boogie but was stuck in a Square Dancing body.