"I've been re-skilled, Jim Lad."
Retrained Professionals Mugs
Kickstart their new career journey with a mug that celebrates retrained professionals—witty, warm, and perfect for their coffee breaks during busy new days.
"Stock options for your thoughts."
"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"
Seniors Snooker Tournament.
Life with a professional baseball catcher.
"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"
"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"
I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.
"Any questions?"
'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'
"I hate performance review season."
'Try and be negative in a positive way.'
"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."
How to deliver a successful presentation.
'I went to my boss and demanded the fruits of my labor. He gave me a Blackberry.'
"Any questions?"
'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'
"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"
'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'
"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"
"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."
"Where we lack in productivity is made up by extremely low employee turnover."
"Take us to your inclusive leader."
"I have a Bachelor's degree from Columbia, an MBA from Stanford, six years experience, and I'm a hell of a mouser."
Hanging off every word...
"Clive used to be an astronaut."
"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."
Quality Control
"Excuse me a moment, whilst I just change hats."
"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."
"Just go with the workflow."
"The GOOD news is that 94 people want to attend the leadership training, the bad news is that 64 of them want to change the venue, 56 the time and 45 want to be course leader."
'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'
"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"
"You may inflict pain, but it mustn't be severe or prolonged."
Retrained Professionals Mugs Collection
Retrained Professionals Pillows
Find pillows tailored for retrained professionals—bring comfort and encouragement into their space.
Retrained Professionals Prints
Browse inspiring prints perfect for retrained professionals—motivate and decorate with meaningful artwork.
Retrained Professionals T-Shirts
Discover t-shirts that honor retrained professionals—blend humor and motivation on apparel they’ll love to wear.