Retirement Adventurer Pillows

"At this stage of your life, you need a hobby - one that will produce income."

Darby and Joan Club with empty mountain bike rack

"Carl made retirement plans with his money, but not with his time."

'I'm afraid I'm in for some dull retirement years.'

"Are you finally going to admit that you've run out of things to do now that you're retired?"

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

"One year closer to college!"

Pina Coladas

Inside One's Memory Bank

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

Retired Canadian t shirt guy.

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

Duel in a wheelchair.

Tourist

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

"From Zero To Sixty In What Seems Like Eight Seconds Flat."

'Is that all you can do Just sitting there watching your old movies'

The Great Pyramid of Geezers

"Don't knock Florida! Where else can a 73-year old man get a 35-year mortgage?"

"What the hell did you do with your day before I retired?"

'It makes you look fifty years younger.'

Altar Ego

"Excuse me sir, is this the environment..?"

'I thought I'd never say this, but I think we might've traveled too far this time!'

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, do we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

"Don't kid yourself. Harold, you're no spring chicken!"

Women

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'