Retail Exploration T-Shirts

The Piranesi Mall

Complaints department

"Gah, they've had a refit."

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"How was work?"

"This town ain't big enough for the proposed outlet shopping mall at Millet Creek Pass."

Myths and legends...

"I'm part of the problem and loving it!"

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

Sign on a sale bin at a bookstore that reads "Latte-Damaged Books".

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."

"I love holiday shopping, but with all the scams this time of year I must be careful."

'Bananas! Once you've skinned them and removed the bone, there's nothing left.'

TV dinners: regular and widescreen

Reality of Parenthood

Awkward customers.

'Sale' 'Your money back if we feel like it'

Priest walks by a religious book shelf and and a Satan book pops out to hit him on the head.

You are what you eat

"Attention, shoppers. We have a lost boomer at the information desk."

Final clearance sale.

Self-Help Books / Fixing Others.

'Just follow my voice to the checkout stand.'

"Putting the Christ back in Christmas."

"It might be this Christmas, it might be next."

'We believe in treating all our customers as individuals...this, for example, is individual no 76/KLC/PO/2387A.'

'Fashion Victim.'

"I wish she's take us. She shops at the 99 scent store!"

Express Checkout: One Basket Only.

'This could be a swell time to buy our selves out!'

'Don't think of it as just another supermarket, think of it as a retail theme park.'

"May I focus my customer frustration on you with the understanding you're powerless and it's nothing personal?"

GARAGE SALE TOUR BUS

"He's about my height but he doesn't have my build."