Restoration Enthusiast Pillows

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

'I found the termites!'

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

Antiques

'I think we're losing sight of out roots.'

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

'We finished all the repairs in the cafeteria kitchen this morning, but the food still tastes lousy.'

'FIre me and you're in big trouble. I'm on the endangered species list!'

Cartoon showing a group snails, one has a large shell underneath him. Another snail, observing, says to his mate: "Another basement conversion.".

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

Auctioneer: 'Sold to the lady whose husband just walked out!'

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

"The keep saying unrestored and what a nice PATINA, Ted. A better-sounding word for old tarnished stuff would be SCRINCH or SKRITCH, don't you think, eh, Ted?"

'Great to see the ol' museum is finally getting a face-lift.' An old building getting a medical face-lift

"Our hobby is finding old, run-down Victorian houses and levelling them."

'Green Peace'

Pompeii restoration project.

'The environment people only worry about endangered species, not endangered individuals.'

Endangered Species.

Under New Mismanagement

Authentic Rinkelmier chair (Built 1723)

'I've just discovered that one of my ancestors was a Security Goose for the Roman Army...'

Books of Tablets

"I'm still looking, sir?"

'They did a great job in restoring all the 19th century details, but this confounded dress code...'

Alderman shocked at a proposal to pull down Temple Bar

"I'm all set to start the weekend reno project..." "And I'm all set to call 911."