Restaurant Goers Who Love Jokes Prints

'This place is a tip.'

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"Bottled, tap or toilet water?"

"Give my compliments to the Biotech industry"

"Did you order the flying jalapeños?"

"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."

Do-it-yourself sushi bar serves live fish to customer.

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

'Our chickens are a real 'come back' story: raised organic, they hooked up with some seedy fowl, but then, thankfully, were saved by massive doses of antibiotics.'

"Just so I’m understanding the menu, the ‘Old Forge wheel with rosemary-infused pancetta’ is essentially a $36 Hot Pocket?"

'Waiter, I think my wife's calamari is underdone.'

'What do you have that hasn't been cloned?'

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"You're in luck. A slot for you just opened up in our kitchen."

'I'd like to order, please.' - 'Okay, what's your table number?' - 'I don't know.' - 'Find it, weak-minded fool!!' - 'What's our table number?' - 'There is no table number.' - 'There is no table number.' - 'You should have been assigned a table number whe

"What fly?"

AS about Today's Specials' - 'Whatever didn't sell yesterday.'

"Waiter! - this soup tastes funny!"

'Too much information! I prefer not knowing my lobster's name was Sigmund.'

"Please be advised that our new chef's policy is that you're not allowed to leave until you've finished all the food on your plate."

"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."

'Have a little patience, Sir - We're not machines...'

'Can you give me a few minutes, Waiter? I can't run on a full stomach.'

"Stop serving Table 3 complimentary bread."

'Fish fresh?' 'I don't know I've only been here two weeks .'

'For obvious reasons the chowder's made with chicken and pork.'

'I'll be talking nonsense when you come to take our order. But, if you pretend I'm speaking French there'll be a big tip in it for you.'

Hugo's in a peevish mood today, I'd finish that broccoli if I were you

"My name's Aldred and I'll be your server this evening."

'Waiter, there're four flies in my soup! How 'bout just moving the bug zapper?'

"The Catch of the Day is the chef's cold."

"Sorry, it’s my first day."