Resort Reality Checker T-Shirts

'We had an all-inclusive-holiday. Bad weather, lousy food, arrogant waiters, crappy hotel and outrageous prices - all that was included.'

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

Skeptic: Critical Thinking, Facts, Debunking.

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

There are dreams...And then there's reality...

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'If you want a reality check, I'll have to see two pieces of I. D.'

Since I took command of the company, I have steered a steady course.

"This says you should expect to spend six months and at least $800 building the perfect lowrider bike."

"We've managed to eliminate every problem except the public perception that we're heading in the wrong direction."

"Do you ever wish you lived in a different era, Randy?" "Well… every waking moment I wish I were living before the beginning of existence itself. So I could witness the Big Bang." "It's safer to keep me where I am. Injecting my advanced virility into more primitive eras could have disastrous effects on the timeline." "That way I could know for sure whether our universe is all just one big simulation running on some geek's computer." "I mean, everything being made up of atoms and math is

'Not yet! Wait until he hits the breaking point... we just gave him some warm, soft bread and the cold, hard butter... THEN we bring out the flimsy plastic knife.'

"You can make your life any way you want it. Don't let your thoughts limit your future. It is possible to achieve your dreams!"

'Perhaps you've been 'lovin it' a bit too much?'

'Yeah? Well... bite me! No... wait!'

"Starting at a new agency can be overwhelming. Let me show you around."

"I believe you were complaining about your cold this morning."

"Maybe you should be depressed, your life isn't that great."

'The more successful I become, the less money I make.'

'Actually, the bill is part of your reality therapy.'

"We need to reduce our overheads."

'I think that's enough enlightenment for now Tim!'

The back of the Taj Mahal.

'You have to learn to face reality.', 'Can't I just sneak up on it?'

"It looked better when I saw it on Instagram."

'He has an MBA from Wharton.'

Young Super Achiever

'Now that's what I call a worthy cause.'

"I'm 'The Drunk Divorced Overweight Chain-Smoking Middle Aged Man.' 'The Wise Man' is on the next peak."