Resonance Master Pillows

'I'm a voice over artist.'

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

"You're just the man we're looking for. Come around to this side of the desk, and I'll gather up my things and get the heck out of here."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

Gary turns 40.

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

'Why do you want a career in the bank?'

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

TV Chef Cooking Range

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

"This universal remote is awesome. It controls the tv, cable, stereo, computer, garage door. . ."

"I'm not the only one who hates you changing the channel every second. Now when you want to watch TV, the remote escapes."

"When you hear me begin talking about our lousy sales figures, you guys create a distraction."

'Your reflexes are still good!'

'I don't get it. He's got only one tongue and two ears, but he talks twice as much as he listens.'

"Breathe in...now breathe out. Excellent! Just remember to keep doing that for the next few years and you'll be fine."

'Well, one of us in wrong.'

"I wonder which will come first. Me finishing this binge worthy Netflix series or another Netflix rate hike."

"Permission to speak in rhyming couplets, sir!"

TV Remote undoes a man's trousers.

Clydesdale never misses a beat.

Mind control

'Helen! I'm all settled in and I don't want to get up. Would you get the remote for me?'

'...it may be advisable to think of a referee other than your mother.'

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

Cook for 3 minutes stir, wait 30 years to discover if the contaminated ingredient gives you stomach cancer.

I'm so busy at home I need three hands. One for the chips, one for the beer, and one for the remote!

Microwave - 'Table 19 sends compliments to the chef!'

'It's the TV remote - he has a death grip on it.'

'It's not a job; it's a calling. So, don't call us. It'll call you.'

'I think the microwave has finally given up the ghost.'

"No, this movie isn't dragging. You've got it on 'pause'."