Reputation Management Pillows

"Before I came I googled your name....did you hold up a convenience store in 2003?"

Others' perceptions (which aren't always true)

'How fast can you hype?'

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

This Message Has No Content

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

Signs: Sales, Profit and Media coverage.

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

'Great Therapy!'

"Commandments aren't really selling these days. However, we're willing to consider self-help tips or personal improvement ideas."

'I'll be a responsible and mature asset to the company, as proven by the lack of asinine photos of me on Facebook.'

'We've got truth, we've got enlightenment, and we've got serenity - what we NEED is media coverage.'

'How fast can you hype?'

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

'Now go out there and sell yourself!'

UBLIC RELATIONS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS

"I've spent all night diluting our negative reviews on Yelp." "Really?" "Yeah. You know how you can usually tell when a business owner does that?" "They post 'reviews' that don't have even a hint of negativity." "Amateurs. Check out the negatives I include: 'House of Java Cafe. I hate it because it's so perfect, it makes the rest of my day feel inadequate.'"

"Remember, Katie, genius is 10% inspiration and 80% media manipulation."

Sportswasher's

Mergers or acquisitions.

"I mind my mother, eat my broccoli and do my homework, but you won't tell the guys, will you?"

"In the marketplace of ideas, we may not have the best ideas, but we have the best marketing."

'I can not tell a lie concerning the cherry tree: mistakes were made. However, I must consult with my spin doctors before saying more.'

'Sir, wife number two is on line one and wife number four is on line three ... or is it the other way around?'

"Brian's considering the optics."

"We specialize in corporate slogans, business brochures and annual reports to shareholders..."

I've spent all night diluting our negative reviews on Yelp. Really? Yeah. You know how you can usually tell when a business owner does that? They post "reviews" that don't have even a hint of negativity. Amateurs. Check out the negatives I include: "House of Java Cafe. I hate it because it's so perfect, it makes the rest of my day feel inadequate."

"I might be down the pub a bit later, Brian, I'm just trying to smooth a few things with the missus."

You can have your privacy back, as soon as I've finished showing it to everyone

"Unfortunately your Twitter has been hacked. Fortunately it has been hacked by someone much cooler and funnier than you."

'This is really going to tarnish his legacy, Al.'

'Hopkins, I want you to write me an inspiring, dynamic speech that bears my unmistakable stamp of genius.'

"I'm not entirely convinced of your strategy as financial PR.."

'Not a problem. Our industry is self-regulated. In fact, I'm scheduled to jump off the roof right after this meeting.'

'Before we begin, management has asked me to announce that it is the policy to discourage all staff members from speaking to the media.'